Lessons from lockdown

by Mollie Millington | Apr 30, 2020 | community, family, happiness, holistic, mental health, self care

We started lockdown (due to coronavirus) in the UK on 30 March 2020.  The rules are you can only leave your home once a day to exercise; dogs can be walked once a day; you can travel to work if you are unable to complete your job from home; if you leave your home you must keep two meters away from others.  Like many other countries and cities, the rules are not black and white, leaving some room for interpretation (such as, how long can I exercise for), but overall you are meant to stay home and not socialize with others.  We are very fortunate to have a garden and be able to work mostly from home (I have to go in every other week and can cycle there).  Maple has also been a nice distraction, but lockdown has made socialising her a bit complicated too.  We are doing the best we can when out on walks (she loves watching people walk by) and hope she doesn’t turn out weird.

Between working, worrying, and puppying, my days have been pretty intense and varied.  I haven’t quite managed to set up a proper routine yet.  I thought I would share a few things I have learned on lockdown, along with how I am coping.  Perhaps you can resonate with some, or can you add to the list?

Gratitude

As I mentioned above, I am very grateful that my husband and I are still both employed full time and also have a garden space to enjoy.  We are still allowed to go outside and visit shops without seeking government permission.  That is a big relief.  I am grateful that so far, my family has been healthy and we have been communicating more often that usual.  I am grateful to have Maple to keep us distracted from the scary stuff going on outside our front door.  She is a good cuddler too.

Patience

Both the puppy and the virus are helping me with this one.  Maple is a puppy and needs time to learn and explore.  She tends to sit and stare unexpectedly on our walks.  I try to let her do so as she is observing the world as it goes by.  When I go for a run, I need to take it easy to allow for social distancing, waiting for traffic so I can stay 2 meters apart from pedestrians, and to not be frustrated with my lack of structured training.  We have also learned patience waiting for deliveries, booking grocery delivery slots, and how in general, things are working a little bit differently out in the world.  In this day and age, Amazon Prime and internet downloads have gotten us so used to instant gratification.  We are learning to live at a slower pace now.

Acceptance

The serenity prayer is something I have embraced for a long time.  Not because I am recovering, but because it is a good reminder that I should not waste energy trying to control things that I cannot.  I tend to have high standards and expect everyone to have the same values that I do. I am reminded that this is not the case on a daily basis, especially in lockdown.

The thing I am having the most trouble accepting is the amount of gloves, masks, and cleaning wipes I see in my local park and on the sidewalks of my street.  People can be so selfish and it is really disappointing (deep breaths).

Here is a link to a printable PDF should you want to hang the image in your home.

The power of napping

Maple still doesn’t sleep through the night.  After a few weeks of letting her cry and spending an hour coaxing her back to sleep, we now set an alarm to wake her up to use the loo at midnight and 3am.  She then wakes up at 5:15am for breakfast.  Sometimes I sleep from 7-9am and it is glorious.  (I am grateful for a flexible working schedule!)

Many people have shared with me that they are finding it hard to sleep or the quality of the sleep they are getting isn’t as good as it used to be.  Self-compassion key here.  Your sympathetic nervous system is on overload.  Being constantly on edge may not be something you are aware of, but this could be why you are finding it hard to sleep.  Take a nap if you want to.  Stay in bed longer if you need to.

Service

With no many things out of my control, I have been blessed to channel some energy in to supporting others in my local community.  We posted a note through the houses on my street, letting folks know we are here to help if they need it due to self-isolation or illness.  I was pleasantly surprised to have several responses from others willing to help and we now have a Whatsapp group.  Two elderly neighbors let me know they are self-isolating, so I text them once a week to check in.

I have also been doing my best to support small business and my friends who work for the NHS.  Hustle Bakes will post brownies to you or a friend.  Dook of Edinburgh make luxury handmade soaps which are the perfect treat for you or a friend who washes their hands a lot.  We are also trying to visit the local shops near us more for fruit and veg, rather than the big chains.  I even paid my hairdresser ahead of time so that she can pay her bills.  She works out of her home as a freelancer and cannot see clients right now.

Charity

Along with supporting small businesses, we have been donating to various fundraisers and charities to help the NHS, the art foundations offering special programming on the television and internet, and those organizations that offer support to vulnerable people and animals.  Don’t get me wrong, we are not donating a lot, but if everyone donated a few quid here and there, it would add up (just look at Captain Tom Moore!).

Communication

Working from home while my team is on site, alongside working from home while my husband does the same has really helped me learn to communicate more effective in several modalities.  At home, I still choose my battles if something is bothering me but I am not waiting as long to address it.  Usually, I am not a confrontational person and James and I tend to be very independent.  However, we are now spending a lot of time together, are sometimes frustrated about the puppy and neither of us have slept the night through in six weeks (due to the dog).

The things I miss

With my injuries, I haven’t been at track much this year, but I do miss my Advent Running family and going to parkrun on Saturday mornings with James (he always beats me).  I also miss seeing my blogger friends at fitness events in London, going to Function360 for my physiotherapy check ups (I am going to schedule a virtual appointment soon), and hitting the gym before work.  Of course, travelling is something that was a big part of our lives before Covid-19 and I am not sure when we will be able to start that up again.  James misses going to the pub.  Each to their own, I guess.

As this pandemic continues, I am sure we will continue to learn more about ourselves and others.  If your lockdown rules are starting to lift, I would love to hear how it makes you feel and if there is anything from lockdown you will continue with or if you plan on returning to life as you previously knew it.  Leave a comment below and let me know.