by Mollie Millington | May 20, 2020 | happiness, mental health
Here in the UK, 18 – 24 May is Mental Health Awareness week. I have shared my own highs and lows with mental health here on the blog with last year’s theme of body image and through other periods in my life when I have struggled. Even though I am the ‘Happiness Personal Trainer,’ I still have times when I feel lost, down, or completely unmotivated. It is something I have experienced my entire life, not just during corona times. During the current pandemic, I have often felt very helpless to change the world around me, with the lows a bit more extreme and my energy totally zapped. To help draw me out of the dark shadows, I have made an effort to help others. It seemed like something I could easily do, sometimes for very little money and even from afar. As I mentioned in a previous post, I check in with some elderly neighbours on a weekly basis, send brownies to my friends who work for the NHS, and sent snail mail to our friends and family as a pick me up. I just like to help (so much so that it sometimes gets me in trouble). You could even call it showing kindness.
As part of my Science of Well-being course from Coursera (I am always enrolled in something), I had to complete a character strengths test. The idea behind character strengths is that they are the positive aspects of your personality and influence your day-to-day behaviour. If you want to find a job you love, you should aim to have the top four or five of your character strengths matched in that role. I was not surprised to see these as my top five (out of the 24 total strengths):
I think because kindness is my #1 and therefore second nature to me, it was really hard for me to write this blog post. All I want to say is, be kind. It makes you feel good and others too. It has been shown to improve mental health, give you a warm fuzzy feeling inside and make you smile (I am making my way through Sonja Lyubomirsky’s The How of Happiness. Check it out!). It can create ripples of good deeds, laughter, and smiles that reach so many more people that you originally intended. I took to Facebook and asked for others to help me speak about kindness. Here is what they said:
Katie from Orbis Expeditions – “One of the best acts of kindness is when someone gives another person the benefit of the doubt. They don’t assume, they give them a chance and look at what might be behind the reaction. That to be is the ultimate kindness.”
Coach Michael – “Kindness is like love. Everybody knows it and shows it but it can be described and acted out in so many different ways.”
Stephen from How Many Miles – “I advise my boys that we never know what people are experiencing or why they act the way that they do. That being kind isn’t just about being nice to people you like or care about, but also showing empathy and respect to those you don’t. I do also say that being kind brings its own rewards. It feels good.”
Showing kindness doesn’t have to cost you much. It can be as simple as giving a compliment; leaving a love note for someone to find; calling a family member to check in; asking the new person at work to join you for lunch; attending a friend’s choir concert; baking an extra loaf of banana bread for your neighbour; cheering on strangers at the parkrun finish line; taking the day off work to show a visitor around your city; taking one million photos without complaining for the one good Instagram shot; giving away your products or services to people in need; introducing friends who might be able to collaborate; or buying your team coffee or cake from the canteen after a busy morning. You get the idea. Personally, I find the creativity part of the fun (see strengths above)! And the return for not only yourself but also the person you are kind to makes it worth it.
Use #kindnessmatters this week to share your stories of kindness you have observed, given or received and how it has helped your mental health. You can also tell your story in a comment below..
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by Mollie Millington | May 13, 2020 | eating, happiness, recipe, self care
How has self-isolation been treating you? Whether your government calls it lockdown, sheltering-in-place or something else, you are probably home more than you are used to. If you follow me on social media, you might have seen my link for a 28 day self-isolation challenge. It offer something relatively simple to do each day. It could be trying something new, cooking, completing a workout or connecting with a friend. The calendar also allows you to track what days you drink and how often you are active. Although I shared it in April, there is no reason why you can’t start today if you missed it.
We switch to a different format for May. I have a few bingo cards for you to try out. Since watching The Phantom of the Opera on YouTube, I have been addicted to AccuRadio’s mutiple Broadway musical channels. This has inspired me to create classic and modern musicals bingo cards (there are two different sets for each category for a total of 96 shows). You can either listen to the soundtrack or watch the film of the musical in a square to cross the square out. Click here to download them as one file.
Musicals aren’t for everybody, but I believe chocolate is, so I asked my good friend, Katie from Cake vs. Scales, to create a chocolate lovers bingo board. She went above and beyond by thinking up two chocolate heavy themes. Please remember if you have any food allergies or intolerance to please check all ingredients before consuming our suggested treats.
First up is a Baking Desserts Bingo. Katie put together 20 of her favourite dessert recipes (many from her own website) and I added a few more that I love (such as my cookie dough guilty pleasure and Guinness cupcakes with whiskey ganache). You can download 30 different boards here and then the recipe links can be found here. This is a good one to challenge friends and family to. Book in a night baking together and see who has the best presentation. Take photos and tag us on Instagram (@ptmollie and @cakevsscales) so we see what you get up to.
The other bingo challenge Katie developed for me was with different types of chocolate bars. Many are only available in the UK, so I in addition to the UK chocolate bar bingo game, I also created a US candy bar version for my readers in the States (aka my mom).
If chocolate or musicals don’t make you happy, why not create your own bingo game? There are lots of websites that allow you to create unique boards. You can use films, TV shows, breakfast foods, chores, homework assignments, whatever you fancy really, to generate 30 different cards. Then you can play against friends and family. Our bingo cards are meant to spark some joy but I know these specific ones will not appeal to everyone. There is nothing stopping you from making your own fun with a little bit of creativity and bingo.
Leave a comment below and let me know which card you tried and how you did.
by Mollie Millington | Apr 30, 2020 | community, family, happiness, holistic, mental health, self care
We started lockdown (due to coronavirus) in the UK on 30 March 2020. The rules are you can only leave your home once a day to exercise; dogs can be walked once a day; you can travel to work if you are unable to complete your job from home; if you leave your home you must keep two meters away from others. Like many other countries and cities, the rules are not black and white, leaving some room for interpretation (such as, how long can I exercise for), but overall you are meant to stay home and not socialize with others. We are very fortunate to have a garden and be able to work mostly from home (I have to go in every other week and can cycle there). Maple has also been a nice distraction, but lockdown has made socialising her a bit complicated too. We are doing the best we can when out on walks (she loves watching people walk by) and hope she doesn’t turn out weird.
Between working, worrying, and puppying, my days have been pretty intense and varied. I haven’t quite managed to set up a proper routine yet. I thought I would share a few things I have learned on lockdown, along with how I am coping. Perhaps you can resonate with some, or can you add to the list?
Gratitude
As I mentioned above, I am very grateful that my husband and I are still both employed full time and also have a garden space to enjoy. We are still allowed to go outside and visit shops without seeking government permission. That is a big relief. I am grateful that so far, my family has been healthy and we have been communicating more often that usual. I am grateful to have Maple to keep us distracted from the scary stuff going on outside our front door. She is a good cuddler too.
Patience
Both the puppy and the virus are helping me with this one. Maple is a puppy and needs time to learn and explore. She tends to sit and stare unexpectedly on our walks. I try to let her do so as she is observing the world as it goes by. When I go for a run, I need to take it easy to allow for social distancing, waiting for traffic so I can stay 2 meters apart from pedestrians, and to not be frustrated with my lack of structured training. We have also learned patience waiting for deliveries, booking grocery delivery slots, and how in general, things are working a little bit differently out in the world. In this day and age, Amazon Prime and internet downloads have gotten us so used to instant gratification. We are learning to live at a slower pace now.
Acceptance
The serenity prayer is something I have embraced for a long time. Not because I am recovering, but because it is a good reminder that I should not waste energy trying to control things that I cannot. I tend to have high standards and expect everyone to have the same values that I do. I am reminded that this is not the case on a daily basis, especially in lockdown.
The thing I am having the most trouble accepting is the amount of gloves, masks, and cleaning wipes I see in my local park and on the sidewalks of my street. People can be so selfish and it is really disappointing (deep breaths).
Here is a link to a printable PDF should you want to hang the image in your home.
The power of napping
Maple still doesn’t sleep through the night. After a few weeks of letting her cry and spending an hour coaxing her back to sleep, we now set an alarm to wake her up to use the loo at midnight and 3am. She then wakes up at 5:15am for breakfast. Sometimes I sleep from 7-9am and it is glorious. (I am grateful for a flexible working schedule!)
Many people have shared with me that they are finding it hard to sleep or the quality of the sleep they are getting isn’t as good as it used to be. Self-compassion key here. Your sympathetic nervous system is on overload. Being constantly on edge may not be something you are aware of, but this could be why you are finding it hard to sleep. Take a nap if you want to. Stay in bed longer if you need to.
Service
With no many things out of my control, I have been blessed to channel some energy in to supporting others in my local community. We posted a note through the houses on my street, letting folks know we are here to help if they need it due to self-isolation or illness. I was pleasantly surprised to have several responses from others willing to help and we now have a Whatsapp group. Two elderly neighbors let me know they are self-isolating, so I text them once a week to check in.
I have also been doing my best to support small business and my friends who work for the NHS. Hustle Bakes will post brownies to you or a friend. Dook of Edinburgh make luxury handmade soaps which are the perfect treat for you or a friend who washes their hands a lot. We are also trying to visit the local shops near us more for fruit and veg, rather than the big chains. I even paid my hairdresser ahead of time so that she can pay her bills. She works out of her home as a freelancer and cannot see clients right now.
Charity
Along with supporting small businesses, we have been donating to various fundraisers and charities to help the NHS, the art foundations offering special programming on the television and internet, and those organizations that offer support to vulnerable people and animals. Don’t get me wrong, we are not donating a lot, but if everyone donated a few quid here and there, it would add up (just look at Captain Tom Moore!).
Communication
Working from home while my team is on site, alongside working from home while my husband does the same has really helped me learn to communicate more effective in several modalities. At home, I still choose my battles if something is bothering me but I am not waiting as long to address it. Usually, I am not a confrontational person and James and I tend to be very independent. However, we are now spending a lot of time together, are sometimes frustrated about the puppy and neither of us have slept the night through in six weeks (due to the dog).
The things I miss
With my injuries, I haven’t been at track much this year, but I do miss my Advent Running family and going to parkrun on Saturday mornings with James (he always beats me). I also miss seeing my blogger friends at fitness events in London, going to Function360 for my physiotherapy check ups (I am going to schedule a virtual appointment soon), and hitting the gym before work. Of course, travelling is something that was a big part of our lives before Covid-19 and I am not sure when we will be able to start that up again. James misses going to the pub. Each to their own, I guess.
As this pandemic continues, I am sure we will continue to learn more about ourselves and others. If your lockdown rules are starting to lift, I would love to hear how it makes you feel and if there is anything from lockdown you will continue with or if you plan on returning to life as you previously knew it. Leave a comment below and let me know.
by Mollie Millington | Apr 14, 2020 | happiness, motivation
When I first heard that lockdown (as we call “shelter in place” in the UK) was a possibility. I was so excited about all the stuff I would be able to do. I was going to write hundreds of blog posts, workout every day, do amazing meal prep, clean the house top to bottom, finish a baby quilt for a friend’s kid who is now three, and start/finish my book about climbing Kilimanjaro. Many of my colleagues were worried about being bored, while I was excited to finally finish all the projects I had started over the years.
And then we got a puppy. We haven’t talked much about our previous dog, which we no longer have. It was hard decision to make not to keep her. Sadly, she was unpredictably aggressive (no matter how much we worked with trainers and the charity we adopted her from). I didn’t think we could get another dog anytime soon after that. However, when we saw all of our upcoming trips being cancelled for months on end, we figured now was the best time to get a puppy. To be clear, normally I am in favor adopting older dogs, who are already house trained, their personality is established, and they are a bit more chilled out. Our experience with our previous dog really upset us quite a bit and we wanted to train a dog to be used to us, up for the pub, and used to riding on the Tube.
Enter Maple (aka moaning_maple on Instagram). She is a Staffie-Mastiff mix and now 11 weeks old. It is estimated she will be 20-25kg when adult-sized but who knows! We love her floppy ears, big paws, and her vocal yawns. We are not keen on the fact that she wakes up three times in the night and takes a lot of coaxing on our laps to fall back asleep. We think we have a system now of setting an alarm and waking her up first, as she then tends to go back to bed right away. I bet the upstairs neighbors appreciate this too!
During the day, she is awake for one to two hours and then naps for the same amount of time, on and off all day. I work from home for a week and then go into work, while my husband is working from home full-time. We are therefore working in shifts to entertain her and work while she is sleeping. The lack of sleep is really playing havoc on me though. I find it hard to concentrate when she is awake as she still has accidents in the house and in her crate (yes, her crate is just bigger than her). When she is sleeping, I am just about able to get into a rhythm when she wakes up and needs me again. Sometime I am so tired, I nap when she naps. Yes, it is really like having a baby (so I am told).
Yesterday, we sat down to address the next phase of her training. As you can imagine, it has been difficult to socialize her during lockdown. We were ‘walking’ her in a rucksack once a day but there were not too many people or cars out. I have taken her into the shops a few times too. She has had her vaccinations now and is able to go on a 10 minute walk. We sometimes carry her to the local park so that she can meet other dogs. Otherwise, we walk her around the block so she can see people, cars, bicycles, and more.
Our biggest priority now is that she learns her name and sleeps through the night. I hope that by sleeping through the night, my energy, and mojo to do more, will return. Having a dog will take up a lot of the time I would use to exercise, craft, or study. She loves us very much and loves to cuddle, which was a treat when she weighed 3kg but also a habit we are trying to break (a 25kg lap dog might not be everyone’s idea of a good time). Once she has stopped growing, I hope she will enjoy being my running buddy.
To rediscover my motivation and get back on the fitness track (and not on the over-eating-and-drinking-alcohol train I have been on), I am starting my ’30 Days to Happy’ program tomorrow (Wednesday 15 April). Many of my friends have shared with me how tired they have felt during lockdown. How they can’t stop eating and drinking throughout the day when stuck inside. How they feel anxious about the state of the world under the cloud of this pandemic. ’30 Days to Happy’ is a safe place to feel uncomfortable, to grow a little outside your comfort zone by exploring ways to find joy through fitness, food, fun, and self-care. Activities will only take 5-10 minutes per day. For those missing structure or being able to plan out their time, this program offers you both, as well as a small distraction from what is going on outside your front door. The accountability of sharing your weekly achievements will help you complete the worksheets, challenges, and workouts we have planned over the course of the 30 days. And, of course, we will cheer each other on in our private Facebook group. A month might seen like a long time to work together but the tools I will teach you will last a lifetime.
In support of all of the healthcare professionals out there, I am offering this program for free to NHS workers (doctors, nurses, patient porters, receptionists, anyone working in a hospital, etc outside the UK). Email mollie@ptmollie.com with NHS in subject to reserve your spot. Or to register now (you need to sign up today as we start tomorrow), click here.
There is a good chance Maple will make a few appearances on the program, if you need an additional reason to join. Although she has taken my mojo, I know my ’30 Days to Happy’ participants will help my mojo return again. Whatever has taken your mojo away, let me try to help bring it back with ’30 Days to Happy.’
by Mollie Millington | Mar 18, 2020 | happiness, health, holistic
NEW START DATE OF 15 APRIL 2020. Sign up today.
Sadly, many people around the world will soon find themselves at home self-isolating, if they are not already. Many of the people I have talked to are concerned they will get bored and have ‘nothing to do.’ I am on the other side of the coin and looking forward to catching up on a few outstanding projects (my nutrition course, a baby quilt for a friend’s kid who is now 3, cooking from scratch). What better time than to offer my 30 Days to Happy online program?
Everyone deserves to be happy. As the Happiness Personal Trainer and a qualified health coach, I have the tools to guide you through small changes that can add up to make a big difference in your daily life. Why not join me for a unique online training program that I developed to cultivate happiness through fitness, food, feelings and fun? I will be there to hold your hand, cheer you on, and guide you through some of your roadblocks as we work together over 30 days.
’30 Days To Happy’ is conducted online, meaning anyone in the world can join as long as they have access to the internet. Held over email and Facebook, we will touch upon attributes of fitness, food, fun and feelings, learning healthy ways to incorporate each into our daily lives by gently stepping in and out of our comfort zones. Feel connected to others in this time of uncertainty.
For only £59, you’ll get a introductory webinar to learn more about the program and meet others in the group; a weekly challenge video and worksheet to complete; personalized coaching via the Nudge app on your Smartphone, and community support in a private Facebook group. We will wrap it up with another video call to see what each participant learned through the course. Overall, it only takes a few minutes a day to complete the weekly challenge.
Testimonials from my pilot session:
“I really enjoyed working with Mollie on the 30 days to happy programme, I learned a lot about my habits and had fun trying new things.” -Julie
“Mollie’s 30 Days to Happy is like a gentle nudge from a friend. She provides really great prompts to dig a bit deeper and really think about your day-to-day mood. It challenges you to find happiness is all aspects of life and see how it all relates. I liked meeting new people through the program too and hope to continue using her tips throughout the year!” -Eileen
Are you in?
The program runs 15 April – 14 May 2020, costing just £59. The strategies you will learn will last a lifetime, so invest in yourself and sign up today. Registration closes 14 April 2020. Sign up via the button below. There won’t be a limit to registrations this time around as I want anyone who needs a personal connection to the outside world to join. I would like to give NHS workers complimentary registration. If this is you, please email me mollie@ptmollie.com. Please help spread the word to friends and family.
by Mollie Millington | Aug 17, 2019 | fitness, happiness, holistic, motivation, self care, virtual training group
Everyone deserves to be happy. As the Happiness Personal Trainer and a qualified health coach, I have the tools to guide you through small changes that can add up to make a big difference in your daily life. Why not join me for a unique online training program that I developed to cultivate happiness through fitness, food, feelings and fun? I will be there to hold your hand, cheer you on, and guide you through some of your roadblocks as we work together over 30 days.
’30 Days To Happy’ is conducted online, meaning anyone in the world can join as long as they have access to the internet. Held over email and Facebook, we will touch upon attributes of fitness, food, fun and feelings, learning healthy ways to incorporate each into our daily lives by gently stepping in and out of our comfort zones.
For only £59, you’ll get a introductory webinar to learn more about the program and meet others in the group; a weekly challenge video and worksheet to complete; personalized coaching via the Nudge app on your Smartphone, and community support in a private Facebook group. We will wrap it up with another video call to see what each participant learned through the course. Overall, it only takes a few minutes a day to complete the weekly challenge.
Testimonials from my pilot session:
“I really enjoyed working with Mollie on the 30 days to happy programme, I learned a lot about my habits and had fun trying new things.” -Julie
“Mollie’s 30 Days to Happy is like a gentle nudge from a friend. She provides really great prompts to dig a bit deeper and really think about your day-to-day mood. It challenges you to find happiness is all aspects of life and see how it all relates. I liked meeting new people through the program too and hope to continue using her tips throughout the year!” -Eileen
Are you in?
The program runs 23 August- 21 September 2019, costing just £59. The strategies you will learn will last a lifetime, so invest in yourself and sign up today. Registration closes 23 August 2019. Sign up via the button below. I am once again limiting the session to 30 people to ensure you get the attention you deserve, so don’t wait. 🙂
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